It all seems too easy

It actually does, doesn’t it? Everything that we see in social media, the seemingly all time highs , the happy and smiles and poses and outfits and sunshine and food and restaurants and well the list goes on and I don’t even need to add all of them here because I’m sure you already know.

But here’s the funny part- if someone goes to my social media page, they will find the same, fluffy stuff, where I posted a happy picture the day after I spent the night before, crying until dawn. Why do we do even do that? Why can’t we tell the world when we are going through a hard time instead of only focusing on the “good” things?

I managed to stay away from social media for a while just for this reason: it’s too stressful to see everybody living the life we want for ourselves. It seems like everyone’s lives are all about friends, family events, weddings, friends again; basically all the fun stuff that we see in the pages of people we know and celebrities. Don’t celebrities have problems in their lives as well? I really admire those who post about the difficult moments that they faced in their lives two days ago. That way their smiling picture has the backstory behind it and we don’t live in a bubble where everything is picture perfect.

Awareness is a virtue that we often fail to recognize. If we were to live in a world where everyone only uploaded the difficult and embarrassing and upsetting moments in their lives, then we would start believing that all things in the universe are ugly and unbearable. What we see, becomes the reality remember?

But here’s the deal-breaker. It is the opposite of easy. Our lives are far from perfect. And I want to mention something here. Something that’s been bothering me lately. My life has always been chaotic and stressful in most cases (naturally because of the way I was taught to look at it). But there has been a few days when I actually lived the life I see regularly on social media. The going out with friends or family part, good company, good food, good weather, everyone around smiling, including myself, etc. So that means I am lucky and fortunate to be living that life right? Even if it was for a day?

But that bubble would burst the second the day or night was over. It became a routine that every time I had a good day, it would be followed by a depressed, lonely, doomed feeling where I would end up trying to remember what exactly I was so chirpy about the day before. And I realised why. Merely convincing ourselves to take it easy, enjoy life a bit, have fun with people around us, not let anyone or anything get to us- isn’t enough. None of it matters, because in the end my heart is still hollow inside. The problem is still there, at the very core- strong and seemingly impeccable. It’s what makes us remember that we are not happy, that nothing in our life seems to work the way we want it to.

I’ll put an end to the post here. Mostly because I don’t want to ramble on and on about something that I don’t know how to solve yet. But I want to express my thoughts and feelings so that people know that behind that smile and a daily response of : “I’m good, how are you?”, there is more pain and distraught hidden, so that they know they are not alone. I will keep going, keep pushing forward despite that dreaded feeling inside me, mostly because I don’t have the choice to quit. I don’t know where life is taking me, but I do know that there are people in this world with much worse problems than mine. I will try not to dwell too much into the past, not have a panic attack about what the future will behold and mostly try to live in the moment and give it the best I can. It’s not easy, it never will be, but I have to go on. Make the “not easy” part be worth it. Or at least try to. In the end for it to get better, it needs to get worse first.

10 thoughts on “It all seems too easy

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  1. True social media do encourage us to share happy moments and there’s an invisible pressure if we share the negative ones. But then again, it’s not always easy to tell strangers the hardships we are going through, because it’s a horrible feeling if we get judge. And judge we will get from those who don’t understand.

    We can only do the best we can in life. The most important is having someone besides us, friends or family who will be there when we need them the most.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Agreed! Its very hard to tell the reality and I’ve always been very affected by peoples’ judgement and negativity..but now I feel like sometimes we should share the struggles behind our smiling pictures as well, so that people know that everything isn’t always so happy and jolly..as for the people close to us..those who really know who we are, won’t judge..and that list isn’t very long 🙂
      Also, quick question: the thing you said about having friends or family who are always there; what should one do if they feel lonely despite having people around them who care?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. That’s a hard question girl. Because to be honest, I have no idea too. Hence why I wrote and posted “Silent Scream” in my blog. There are times when I feel so depress that even my son, the apple of my eyes, can’t console me. But it helps that my family is around, just knowing that they are around helps even if it hurts like hell, and I keep barking at them like a crazy dog.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Oh gosh, can’t imagine how crappy that must feel..but you are so strong and I really admire you for that! And yes family helps..if most times they’re encouraging enough 🙂 My family is there and my parents are alive which is naturally a blessing but they spend every minute reminding me I’m not married and makes it seem that life will be over if I don’t get a life partner..I try so hard to be strong but that’s also when it gets lonely as ever 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Thank you 🙂
        True, the more strong we try to be when we’re at the weakest, the more lonely it feels inside.
        I guess parents sometimes pressure us unnecessarily. I don’t know how old you are, but I don’t think it’s good to rush to find a partner no matter the age. I know a woman who refused to enter a relationship because no one seem to fit her. She reached 50 before she found someone, but that someone is perfect for her.

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      4. Thats very motivating! Im near my 30s, doesnt seem so old in theory but in my culture it is a very very big thing..and i absolutely agree with the “don’t need to rush” statement, id rather be alone than having to spend it with someone im not happy with, but honestly don’t know how much longer I can fight the parents pressure 😦
        And yes its very hard to be strong in such cases, I guess that’s why I started blogging, keeps me motivated about the positive parts to focus on! And also it feels less lonely because now I have you guys to share it with! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      5. 🙂 I’m glad blogging helps you 🙂

        I’m from the Philippines, and back in the day when I was a teen, 25 year old are being being tease for going a bit too close to old maids, or 30s being out of date. Maybe I’m too much influence by Europe now since I’ve live here for a long time, but a lot of women in their 30s here are not in panic at all. Although, I don’t agree with rushing, I do understand the pressure a bit, we are after all unable to bear children if we wait too long. Still, I’ll never recommend anyone to rush in.

        I hope you’ll have a great day ❤

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      6. Yeah that’s exactly why we are rushed but if it doesn’t happen or isn’t meant to so why take the stress in the long run..im trying to get into the habit of not worrying too much about the future because who knows if I’ll even be alive or healthy to get married but well parents don’t think like that..And yes I get what you said about the negativity surrounding people as they get older..sigh..
        And thanks for listening..hope you have a great day too 🙂
        (And for the record my day was pretty annoying but still tomorrow will be a new (and hopefully better?) day 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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